Wednesday, August 25, 2010


This is the second installment after "The Ladder" when reddywhp and I had some good fun with each other and got to know each other, and this is the other half of the scene. He also has written about this part of the scene, but we're doing an experiment to figure out how each of us experienced it. His side of the story is here. Let's pick up where we just left off:

"How are you doing," he asks.
"Great. It's a bit tough," I laugh.
"Good. You want to do something else?"
"I'm not going to be any easier..."
"That's fine."
"I want to see what you can take."

We moved to the living room rug. He kept the harness of rope on and tied my hands with the ad hoc rope wrist restraints together behind my back. He said, "Just drop," kicked the back of my knee, and I just fell with it, comfortably landing on the rug facedown. He ravenously picks up my legs and tie them to the wrist restraints, à la hog tie. He sets me on my right side and then lays next to me and toys with my cock a bit, and hits my balls a couple of times. He says, "Okay, I'm going to see how much your balls can take. I want you to look into my eyes and focus on me. Deep breaths. When it becomes too much, say 'no' or 'stop,' but I really want it to be too much, because I'm just going to stop when we're done." I take this as a challenge to prove to Sir that I can do this for him. He starts, with his thumbs and index fingers clutched around my sack and grabs them. He gets them first asymmetrically and puts excessive pressure on my right ball. He realizes this and tells me, "It's easier if there is equal pressure on the two balls. You can take a lot more that way. Tell me if one gets more pressure than the other. I nodded and we continued.

I, laying there, just stared into his eyes, ready for this to start. It begins a level of pleasure, and I'm telling myself I can do this. And then he starts to increase the pressure. Slowly it becomes intense. He's looking at my facial expressions, reading my discomfort in pain, as I lay there breathing in and out, staring back at him. I feel like he's looking into me, not at me. I'm completely open, and he can read me. My breathing gets interrupted; he prompts me to continue to breath in and out, deeply. We move further and further. The pain becomes great. I can barely take it except for his encouraging eyes, my will, and a voice that says "you can do this." It continues to escalate, and I feel my eyes start to well up.

My eyes are welling up, I thought in glee. I have always wanted this moment. My first s&m cry is coming. Holy shit. It's happening. And I'm sharing it with him. When I feel this, the balls cease to be my primary concern. The tears come, and I'm so in awe that I'm here. He asks, "Are you good? Should I stop." My primary thought was "FUCK NO! I WANT THIS!" but all I can say is authoritatively, "More." I wanted him to know I was so happy at this point, in this point of torture, but I could only muster that much out. This needed to continue. He acknowledges my request and we continue. My tears accumulate and start flowing down my face. I'm still breathing deeply and rhythmically, staring back into his eyes. Time moves on, and he applies more pressure slowly as tears stream down my face.

I'm broken at this point. Fully at his mercy, I have completely let go of any worries and ideals. I am trying to keep my mind off my balls, off my tears and only on keeping it on my breathing and on his eyes. I can't tell if I am doing 'well', if this is 'normal', if this is 'poor', if this is a 'good job', but I don't really care at this point. I am doing my best right now, and am at my limits, and breaking many limits that existed before. This was the new edge.

The pressure was going further than excruciating. I could feel myself wanting to scream "stop" but I wanted to hang in to the last second that I could, and then wait five more. I was living for each second, each series of inhaling and exhaling in this agony. And then I felt something move on my balls and I immediately screamed "Stop!" as he virtually simultaneously lifted his hands off of my balls.

I started to breath faster and sob. He had broken me, and it was such a good feeling. It's really what this is about. He rolled me into him, and held me. He wanted to make sure I was okay. He told me I did a good job, that I did well. I felt proud of myself. I could feel my heart burst with the pride that he had given me. He started to untie me, and I bemoaned the fact that I was getting my freedom back. I told him "Thank you" and he told me he enjoyed himself. I told him that it was my first cry and I wasn't going to forget this any time soon. He replied, I don't think you forget your first cry, and I agreed. I joked "Well you definitely achieved your goal-- I want to play again with you." He smiled, and I kissed him.

He starts to change while we are talking and I get a glimpse of bare ass, and then push him onto the bed and rim him a bit just for fun's sake. He has a beautiful ass and I wanted some of it for a bit, after being in such a restrictive position to not be able to get to it. We decided that we needed to go, and then heard someone knock on the door to the cabin when we were getting ready, so we got dressed and went to greet them.

Until next time, I wish you

Fisting, fireplay and facefucking,

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