New years resolutions

Sure, it's that day where you have to figure out what you want in your life and man up and do it. Last year it was a very simple one: "Explore kink as much as you can and learn about yourself on the way." And I really did, and I hope there will be some posts on this soon. Now for next year

1. Swim More.

Fuck Michael Phelps, the Thorpedo was always my favorite.

I really miss my swimming and that's really a shame, since I have access to a pool at my university. I swam for 12 years competitively, so I really need to get back into the pool and get some yardage down. I miss being able to swim cleanly.

2. Blog More.

I've wanted to write so much of my year down but I haven't. I have a 9 page document on my IML experience that I haven't even finished the first 24 hours of my IML experience. I want to finish that, and other kink experiences that I haven't written up.

3. Pass my orals.



I'm in a PhD program and this is the make-or-break year when it comes to exams. One more exam. Put in a room, three men face me and barrage me with questions for 2-5 hours. Talk about an interrogation scene, only less sexy and more quantitative. Wish me luck on prepping for this. After that and four classes this spring, I'm all but dissertation. And no, you're not the first one to make a joke about blowjobs about the name of this exam. It's been happening for probably the >100 years this exam's been set up by my program. I'm worried for this exam. Though, when I was high school, I was the Georgia High School State Oralist Champion, and have the trophy to prove it. And, on the bus ride home from the competition, that trophy totally got deepthroated, at the adoration of all my friends. No lie. I'm surprised I haven't gotten a trophy for that though. *taps foot impatiently*

Later.

Until then, I wish you a happy new year, hairy chests, and hunky Doms,
Bo

My first rubbery exposure.

When I was 13, I watched every episode of G Gundam, and I always got a chubby when the variations of this scene happened, but I didn't quite understand why. Start at 0:23. I want one of these. Like now.



Until then, I'll accept rubber enclosure and catsuits.

Bo

The Beginning.

This is the first piece of a suite of posts about my last year, my first real year in teh kink community, and about the changes and progress I had in the community and as a sexual being.

December 18th, 2009.

This day is my rubber anniversary. I had broken up with my ex in May, a serious one where we called each other partners in social professional settings. And I had started to explore a bit. I started with a dating a couple, who both helped me enter the realm of kink and get to know a bit how it works, but I really consider my rite of passage to kink when I walked into the leather man on this day over a year ago and purchase my first rubber.

It was my first day of freedom after my first semester of PhD school, and I bussed up to NYC. I met so called ex, and said that no matter what happened that night, I wanted to go to the Leather Man so that I could look around. I didn't know what I wanted, but I wanted something. We hung around and ended up on Christopher street, and wandered around in the store, somewhat unsure of what I wanted. A kind man noticed my insecurity but curiosity as I went up and down the spiral staircase in the two-floored store.

"Hi there. What are you looking for? Can I help?"

I was sheepish, and looked at my ex, someone who while we were dating just kind of rolled his eyes at my kinky desires (he's now come around and tried things). And then I just piped up, "I want some gear but I'm not sure." I kept eyeing the neoprene singlets, but I then came over to the rubber and kept touching it over and over. It felt nice. The friction was weird, and I didn't quite get it. The storeclerk just suggested, "I'll help you put it on." I looked at my ex, and he was just shrugging, as he always did about my kinks. But this time, I was going to fully engage it and do it. It was my time to claim my sexual agency. I was myself now and independent and not trying to prove anything. I first put on a rubber jockstrap and it was just kinda okay and fun. I liked jocks before. I had done that plenty, and it was just nice. It was a nice E7 piece, though I really didn't know what that meant back then. After that, I put on this black shirt t-shirt with a red horizontal stripe on the front (from Syren). This was not an easy task. They were using talc on my hairy chest and slowly getting it on. I, of course, didn't know that other pieces were easier to get on, and, apart from long sleeve no-zip shirts, think that these t-shirts are still teh hardest things to get on when comes to rubber.

The feeling. Just having the rubber surround my torso like that was amazing. It wasn't something I expected. I thought it to be weird but I really loved it. My ex just told me about the glow I had on my face when I put it on, and the clerk was giddy. It was something I really enjoyed, and from then I knew this was something I kept.

I bought the two pieces for around 100$, a great sale. They told me to put it in cornstarch when not using it, which I found to be messy and unuseful after one of my best friends and I tried that when I got back to philly to store it for the winter break.

This story means a lot to me, as I feel that my first purchase of rubber signified my entrance into the kink, and my rite to passage for starting to nurture my sexual agency on my own. I actively looked for a way to physically demonstrate my interest in kink by buying my first rubber. I think that the first piece is always the most important step in the realm of kink, and actually buying it is the first plunge. I celebrated the first piece a year later. That day resonates in my memory still.

Review of MIR

I was charged with writing a review of MIR by one of the volunteer members of the staff, so I thought that I'd put it here as well. I think these community events are really amazing and tie the group together. The internet is great and all, but there's safety, cohesiveness, and a great time by all when these events go well. I really appreciate all the hard work everyone at MIR did this year, especially the volunteers. This is a 100% honest review, so I'm going to bare it all here:

MIR 2011 was my first MIR experience so I cannot compare it to earlier events. I got there at around 9:30 pm on Friday, as my flight was late, and headed straight to the Majestic Hotel, as I booked my room after the host hotel was fully booked. Also, word has it that the Majestic was better than the Hawthorne Terrace hotel, so many people stayed there, to my knowledge.
I texted all my friends and they replied, “Go to Cell Block, we’re not staying at the event.” I was a bit confused, as the Greet the Meat events are usually quite popular, and personally I really enjoyed the Greet the Meat rubber event at IML, as I met quite a handful of good-looking perverts. So, this social maneuver of my friends was a bit curious until I met them at Cell Block after I got dinner and change into rubber and it was around 10:30. I asked them why they didn’t go to the event itself: “It’s a rip-off.” Now, I come into these events feeling that at some point I’m going to pay for a rip-off, but it’s in part a way to support the event or the community as a whole. It’s just financially what a community member must accept to keep the events afloat; however, I was told of the $30 cover charge for just the Greet the Meat event. This was absurd to me, especially when I was told that the drinks at the party still costing a fair amount. People I talked to were certainly dropping plenty of cash on a bartab, but the cover really turned them off. On the other hand, CODE, at the same time, was offering two free drinks after you paid $10 cover just across the street. This was a no-brainer.

Cell Block was packed, but no one was going into the back room where CODE was. There was no incentive. The Cell Block manager firmly does not allow frontal nudity, so the back offered no more sexual solace than the front of the bar, hence the reason everyone just stayed in the front. Rubbermen took over the bar anyways, so this makes sense to not feel persecuted in the front of the bar.

When you look at it from a historical perspective, or what I surmise from the oral history of MIR, this is what MIR is all about: bar night(s). It started as just one evening in a bar, and now it’s grown to be an IML clone, and it’s not astonishing if it is hemorrhaging money by trying to be IML. It needs to keep its own identity, own culture and own pride. People loved that night, and everyone had a smile on their face seeing old and new faces. I saw all my good friends and loved giving them the hugs and smooches that they deserve, but I also enjoyed meeting new faces, like rubberswim from NYC, Mel from Louisiana, and pdondel from Columbus OH. The Cell Block party in the front, by being low key and not trying to be anything at all, became the de facto Greet the Meat party, and it was really fun.

The next morning, I woke up, got a great continental breakfast, got ready and went to the market at around 12:30. I really wanted to find jeans or leggings, with a thru zip. Let me just say, I found neither at the event. There was a lot of rubber, sure, but the market had a few holes of things that I would have wanted. TLS, Polymorphe, and Mr. S all brought their A-game when it came to merchandise, but I did not feel like recon brought as much as desired, even though I did buy my polo from recon in the end. I ended up having to buy the pants off of my new friend pdondel whose jeans did not fit him anymore. I also really enjoyed the gear swap part of the event. That was a really nice touch, though there were some things that had nothing to do with rubber in the gear swap, which made me feel like the Chicago rubbermen were just being desperate.

During the day, there was chatter about a protest party in the locker room at the Center, charging something like $3 a person for all you can drink until the liquor runs out type of party. It was a really funny idea, but people ended up not following through.

Then I ended up seeing Ruff of the infamous ruff’s stuff blog, someone that deserved a smooch the night before and, also, my utmost friendship. We chatted for a second and then we talked about getting me into a gimp suit for a demo. I was down. So we grabbed Reddy (reddywhp), whom you all may remember from the “Cry” and “Ladder” entries. We put me in a red gimpsuit and then they played with me for a bit, before putting me in a sling. Then John Jacobs just enters the scene kind of randomly and helps put some bluebands around my cock in prep for electro. I’m not a fan of the bluebands, but we just kind of played with it and practiced on getting me more used to them, but didn’t do anything extreme. I was much more happy just at the level of gimpsuit. It’s really fun if you’ve never tried one on. It was kind of loose, so it didn’t destroy my arms as much it does typically for someone. The following picture is of this scene, which was posted on The Leatherati flickr, "Photo by Brian Mincey," while RubberZone is also claiming it.




Anyhoo, once I had escaped (reluctantly) the clutches of Reddy, I tinkered around still searching for pants, leggings, or chaps, finding nothing I wanted, until it was time for dinner. Dinner I went to Fast&Fresh. Sounds pretty terrible. It’s actually amazingly good. If you’re looking for something greasy, yet fresh, this is the place. I just needed to grab something and then get ready for the Hole that night.

I’m always kind of intimidated by cruisy areas like the Hole; rather, I should say I used to be. The Hole was great. I went in the same thing I wore the night before: a full black catsuit, chemical rubber gloves and thigh high rubber firemen waders. This night, however, the waders were going to be used as urinals. I got there early, and no one was there quite yet, but the place just filled to the brim, almost like my waders. The juxtaposition was uncanny. As everyone from the contest filled in, I remember meeting MIR 2011, GMan from Atlanta, and talking to him about someone having to use pudding in the competition, while another contested was getting fucked against the wall right next to him. “Making pudding, I see…”

The sleaziness of the Hole was really nice and refreshing for a place of refuge for us. I got some good fun in, and ended up leaving the second time 2am came around. Daylights Savings Time was awesome. I ended up getting home safely thanks to a cab, but no thanks to the driver falling asleep at the wheel at least three different times.

The next day, I was pretty tired and kind of hung around the market halfheartedly. I got to try out the Fist cube which was really a great time, especially because two hotties were playing with me in it. There was a camera all up in my grill though, as the cameraman was trying to get coverage immediately, which kind of made the mood lost a bit. The film was forced, instead of people just being able to have fun and keep the event as a word of mouth, a bonding opportunity, and something organic. It would have been so much more fun for the bondage experience here to be just about evildoug, ruff, and me playing around and being all smiles, and others playing around all smiles, than making MIR into a big hullabaloo.

I chilled and ended up going home to take a nap that afternoon, going out with an adorable friend for dinner, and then heading to the Sunday night party at Sidetrack. Showtunes Sunday in rubber was phenomenal. Everyone was having a great time, and, if there’s anything rubbermen know, it’s the lyrics to the Golden Girls Theme Song. I had a great time and ended up staying for a long time after showtunes ended and going home with an adorable kinky boy that wasn’t into rubber. So it goes!

In the end, I really enjoyed MIR, for what MIR used to be and should continue to be. MIR is trying to be IML for rubber, but that’s not what it’s been. It started as an excuse to have a bar night, and then it has evolved since. I’m hoping that MIR XV next year will bring it back to the roots of the event, and will focus on the bar nights. Each of these events have their own huge pull. For IML, the pull is its sheer size, market depth and broad interest. MAL has the friendliest lobby. And MIR is known for its bar nights. Bring them back. This is also how MIR should regain its revenue, via the bar nights. They outsourced to CODE and Recon this last year, but I think they might want to reconsider that in order to gain cash. People go to MIR because rubber is a tight-knit community, full of people that really enjoy each other, want to go out in rubber, flirt, and get laid. The party atmosphere is what’s beautiful to these events, and by having a host hotel sans lobby, you’re depriving the organic system of a kink event of its bloodflow. MIR can be the future of kink, where MAL and IML are the history and current strongholds, but it has to understand the beautiful humanity of the kink community, and the bright socialization and community that it tries to service. And trust me, there’s plenty of good service to be done that would go plenty rewarded.

I’m excited for MIR XV, but it’s got some room to improve.

MIR 2011 Highlights from Mr. International Rubber on Vimeo.

In other news, Merry Christmas, hope you get all the rubber you wanted. :-)
Bo

Hypno

Yesterday I had a session with my friend Neil, the erotic hypnotist. He’s a good-looking guy, typical New Yorker and it was a pleasure to meet him. I really knew why everyone I talked to before for references told me he was great. He is. So, I got on a bus from Philly to go up to New York City, and texted him I was on my way. I’m always a bit hesitant to go up to NYC in the winter, especially when snow is in the forecast but I kind of bit the bullet and went anyways, because I wanted to see what he could do hypnotically. Here's a (somewhat obfuscated) pic of the guy:



This wasn’t my first hypno rodeo. In August, I actually got a piece of hypno magic done to me by a wonderful pup in Chicago, and it raised more questions than it answered about hypno. I felt that he got me under, as I felt broken for just the second time of my life. I ended up crying as I started to go under. He had me barking like a dog, saying I’m a dog, etc. We threw another person in the mix, and while I really enjoyed that part of it, it felt like I lost my trance a bit when that occurred. I was excited to do it again, since I hadn’t had the opportunity to play with that hypnopup again.

So when I got up to NYC, I didn’t know what to expect, as Neil kind of kept it as a surprise. I liked this, but I also was kinda worried. Curious what he could get me to do. We met on a random corner in Chelsea, and walked to get lunch, we then chatted and got to know each other better. We hit it off since we both are mathematicians by training, and we could relate on this analytical base. After lunch we headed to his apartment, he gave me a tour and gave me a spiel about the science of hypnotism.
The ideas behind hypnotism scientifically are very interesting. I haven’t vetted what he said, so it might just be a mind trick to tell you that it’s 100% scientific, but either way, he assured me that what happened would be natural and that I should just go with whatever was most comfortable. He told me that hypnotic states are exactly how we put our mind into dealing with more than one thing at once. It’s different from both sleeping and waking mental states, making a third mental state. We apparently go into several hypnotic states a day, but we don’t know when we enter them.

After this, he kind of did a minor hypnotic trick with me when I stood up to get something, and then saw if I was susceptible. He called it a kind of party trick, but I was really ready to get down to seeing what happened. He started to put me under. I was relaxing for a good solid time and he gave me my first trigger. When he said the trigger word, I was to go back to sleep in a form of relaxation. When I awoke he immediately put me back under. I didn’t think it was working so I shook my head and then I just stopped fighting it and went under anyways. I feel like a lot of hypnosis is just letting your conscious mind roll back and letting your subconscious take hold and having someone dominate you via your subconscious.

He then got me deeper and deeper, I was to count back from 100 to 1, stopping when it didn’t matter anymore. I think I stopped around 68 after messing up quite a few times. When writing the alphabet in my head everything became jumbled. I was losing grasp of consciousness. He then gave me a sensory trigger, every time he touched my wrist, I’d feel an orgasm. He woke me up, we chatted a bit, he came closer to me, and I knew what was coming. He took a hold of me, and it really actually felt like I was coming. He did this quite a few times, and at the end, when he was holding onto my wrist, I was thrashing all over the couch.

After this fun for a bit, he said, “do you believe in hypno now?” I just looked at him and said, “uh, you knew I had gone under before….” And then he said this is the vanilla stuff, now we can go to the kinky stuff. He then put me under and gave me new triggers: “statue” which is basically immobilization, “freeze” which was supposed to put you under and still, though for me, I ended up collapsing when it was called, “cuffs” coupled with touching your hands together made them inseparable like handcuffs. He also gave me “sensitive” and “no sensitive” which made my skin tingle when he touched me, and “horny x” where x was a number between 1 and 10. Oddly, I immediately went for rimming him each time horny 10 was called. I guess that’s what my subconscious really likes when I’m horny. Good to know!

At one point after horny 10 was called, we broke a glass that I was drinking water out of before the session. He put me on statue while he cleaned up. The problem was that my hand was stuck behind my head and cutting off circulation. While I actually was in hypno-bondage, I couldn't rationalize to myself to move. I wasn't able to move and my hand just kept throbbing as he cleaned. I couldn't move my lips to tell him anything. My subconscious was telling my conscious side it was not a good idea, while my conscious pleaded to move so I got circulation. My hand was burning. And then I got released and got to move after he cleaned. While I don't think this was safe, and Neil didn't mean to do this to me, but it really communicated to me how real the hypno-bondage was. I imagine if I were in actual imminent danger with my hand, my subconscious would have broken the trance....

At some point he gave me some trigger to become a puppy, and I really got into it and became a good puppy. It was pretty wild!

It was really impressive what he could do and he put a trigger also that when he allowed me to cum only when he gave me permission and it’d be twice as intense and twice as long as my longest. When I finally got permission, it was the longest orgasm I can remember. In the end, I can tell you that hypno really worked for me, and I can tell you right now it's best to go in with no expectations as it will not be what you expect it to be, but it's really fun. I really had a great time with it, and can't wait to see what will end up happening the next time I do it! :-)

We then went to the Leatherman where I bought a ball parachute, due to my love of ball stretching, and we went to dinner afterwards. We talked about dating the community, took the metro back to the bus and he gave me a kiss and sent me on my way.

Until next time I wish you...

hypno, hunks and hijinks,
Bo

Catsuit in public

So, last night I wore my full latex suit out to thePhiladelphians MC OUTFest party at The Bike Stop. Per usual, I was the only boy in rubber, at all, but I still had tons of fun but I really enjoy hanging out with the leather guys and they respect my fun in rubber, if not fully embrace it. It was kind of fun because I got five reactions from each person:

5. What the fuck is that made of?; Is that latex/rubber?; and Is that latex or rubber?

This I find highly amusing, since the gay leather community/kink community have never seen latex/rubber in person, so I have been almost single-handedly opening their eyes to it slowly. Everyone just keeps on saying they love it, but they just haven't seen it before.

The best of this was when the GM came up to me, touches my rubber and says, "wait, that was rubber right?" and I replied affirmatively. He immediately responds, "I got to go. I'm hospital allergic to latex. I'm gonna go wash my hands 7 times." And then later I just saw him and the smell of the rubber got to him so badly he had to go into a different room.... It was sad, but still kind of laughable throughout.

4. Is that the original catwoman suit? Meow!

I find this reaction hilarious. First off, I don't take myself seriously, so I'm not hurt or offended when someone starts bringing out the claws. Though they should expect me to return it. I find that the majority of people that make fun of the rubber are either self-conscious and wish they could have the freedom to actually wear something like it, or they just feel the need to have someone below them. Some of them though, like one of my friends, makes fun of it since he genuinely is into rubber and just likes to mess around joking about it himself.

3. Holy shit that's hot.

This I get a lot from people that are kinky and into leather, since they haven't been exposed to it and then they note what it is and then they finally get exposed to it. I let people touch my rubber in a bar because I want them to get actually get what it feels like and how they interact with it. I feel this is a way to make rubber a lot more accessible and humanizing and people start to understand it a lot more.

2. I'm going to go jerk off to you.

You get more creepsters. Some dude said this to me 10 times in one night. Once is enough. When you start repeating yourself, you're just making things awkward.

1. Thank you.

I went up to the 2nd floor, the short stop to hang out with one friend and his two lady friends a bit, and I got stopped by a nice asian boy on the way down and he said "Your rubber looks really good." And I said thanks and introduced myself. He then said "thanks." I was kinda taken aback by this, until he just said "I'm into rubber too, I just don't come out in it." There's gems of people like this strewn throughout this city, and seeing someone else. It's like when you see your first gay couple on the street when you're young and questioning and you know "I'm not alone."

It's hard to get people together, but I do this partly as a way to find out who is into it, introduce the curious, and open up the topic to discussion. The people that are worried no one else is into it in the city start to notice that many are, and will hopefully start to feel more comfortable wearing rubber out to the bars. Gear's coming back into style to wear to the Bike Stop in Philly, after a long hiatus, but it's only happening because people are starting to make it happen. This is how we're going to take our community back from the strictly online type of community it has become, and put it back into physicality.

But let's be honest, I also do it because I'm a pervy rubberboy that loves being in full coverage rubber, and I can always get the hot boy's phone number at the end of the night when I go out in rubber.

Until next time,
Bo

Cry

This is the second installment after "The Ladder" when reddywhp and I had some good fun with each other and got to know each other, and this is the other half of the scene. He also has written about this part of the scene, but we're doing an experiment to figure out how each of us experienced it. His side of the story is here. Let's pick up where we just left off:

"How are you doing," he asks.
"Great. It's a bit tough," I laugh.
"Good. You want to do something else?"
"Sure."
"I'm not going to be any easier..."
"That's fine."
"I want to see what you can take."

We moved to the living room rug. He kept the harness of rope on and tied my hands with the ad hoc rope wrist restraints together behind my back. He said, "Just drop," kicked the back of my knee, and I just fell with it, comfortably landing on the rug facedown. He ravenously picks up my legs and tie them to the wrist restraints, à la hog tie. He sets me on my right side and then lays next to me and toys with my cock a bit, and hits my balls a couple of times. He says, "Okay, I'm going to see how much your balls can take. I want you to look into my eyes and focus on me. Deep breaths. When it becomes too much, say 'no' or 'stop,' but I really want it to be too much, because I'm just going to stop when we're done." I take this as a challenge to prove to Sir that I can do this for him. He starts, with his thumbs and index fingers clutched around my sack and grabs them. He gets them first asymmetrically and puts excessive pressure on my right ball. He realizes this and tells me, "It's easier if there is equal pressure on the two balls. You can take a lot more that way. Tell me if one gets more pressure than the other. I nodded and we continued.

I, laying there, just stared into his eyes, ready for this to start. It begins a level of pleasure, and I'm telling myself I can do this. And then he starts to increase the pressure. Slowly it becomes intense. He's looking at my facial expressions, reading my discomfort in pain, as I lay there breathing in and out, staring back at him. I feel like he's looking into me, not at me. I'm completely open, and he can read me. My breathing gets interrupted; he prompts me to continue to breath in and out, deeply. We move further and further. The pain becomes great. I can barely take it except for his encouraging eyes, my will, and a voice that says "you can do this." It continues to escalate, and I feel my eyes start to well up.

My eyes are welling up, I thought in glee. I have always wanted this moment. My first s&m cry is coming. Holy shit. It's happening. And I'm sharing it with him. When I feel this, the balls cease to be my primary concern. The tears come, and I'm so in awe that I'm here. He asks, "Are you good? Should I stop." My primary thought was "FUCK NO! I WANT THIS!" but all I can say is authoritatively, "More." I wanted him to know I was so happy at this point, in this point of torture, but I could only muster that much out. This needed to continue. He acknowledges my request and we continue. My tears accumulate and start flowing down my face. I'm still breathing deeply and rhythmically, staring back into his eyes. Time moves on, and he applies more pressure slowly as tears stream down my face.

I'm broken at this point. Fully at his mercy, I have completely let go of any worries and ideals. I am trying to keep my mind off my balls, off my tears and only on keeping it on my breathing and on his eyes. I can't tell if I am doing 'well', if this is 'normal', if this is 'poor', if this is a 'good job', but I don't really care at this point. I am doing my best right now, and am at my limits, and breaking many limits that existed before. This was the new edge.

The pressure was going further than excruciating. I could feel myself wanting to scream "stop" but I wanted to hang in to the last second that I could, and then wait five more. I was living for each second, each series of inhaling and exhaling in this agony. And then I felt something move on my balls and I immediately screamed "Stop!" as he virtually simultaneously lifted his hands off of my balls.

I started to breath faster and sob. He had broken me, and it was such a good feeling. It's really what this is about. He rolled me into him, and held me. He wanted to make sure I was okay. He told me I did a good job, that I did well. I felt proud of myself. I could feel my heart burst with the pride that he had given me. He started to untie me, and I bemoaned the fact that I was getting my freedom back. I told him "Thank you" and he told me he enjoyed himself. I told him that it was my first cry and I wasn't going to forget this any time soon. He replied, I don't think you forget your first cry, and I agreed. I joked "Well you definitely achieved your goal-- I want to play again with you." He smiled, and I kissed him.

He starts to change while we are talking and I get a glimpse of bare ass, and then push him onto the bed and rim him a bit just for fun's sake. He has a beautiful ass and I wanted some of it for a bit, after being in such a restrictive position to not be able to get to it. We decided that we needed to go, and then heard someone knock on the door to the cabin when we were getting ready, so we got dressed and went to greet them.

Until next time, I wish you

Fisting, fireplay and facefucking,
Bo

The Ladder

Two weekends ago, I went to a gear weekend with some fellow gearheads and kinksters. We rented out a cabin, chalet and former bed and breakfast in Western Pennsylvania to have complete privacy to do what we felt. It was a lot of fun. I only knew about five of the guys at the beginning and then I met the rest and really got along with them all. There's usually a connection that's immediately found between two people that have kink inclinations, and that really makes closeness come more naturally. Despite the open and clear motives that such a weekend entails, I still find it somewhat difficult to initiate things, but I got a sufficient amount of play done. This post will entail the most powerful scene that I had that weekend. I am not going to stylize the encounter to sound hot, but tell it as best my memory can. I find the realness of what happens in a scene much more important.

Well, we'll start by setting where the connection laid. reddywhp and I met Friday night when he came while everyone was relaxing at the end of the night somewhat tipsy. He was in work clothes, not my style, so I really didn't pay much attention except for that he was a geniunely nice guy. (I was, at that point, sitting to another guy that currently had my attention) At breakfast the next day I see him and we start horsing around a bit and he just starts to crush my nipples while we're next to each other on the couch. I start to see our chemistry. He's a bigger guy, which makes it nice to be held close. He is strong, so I can try to resist, but it frankly won't last in the long run. This is nice. At any rate, we start to make out and really explore each other, and I get on top and try to get to his cock, as a curiosity of what's there more than anything else. I try to put my hand down his pants to his chuckling "it'll take more than that." He had a wrestling singlet on under his polo and cargo shorts. I take the polo off and he has beautiful hair.


(Aforementioned singlet on aforementioned reddywhp, from his flickr)

I play with that a bit as we chat, talk about what both of us like, chat about limits, and learn more about each other both kinkwise and platonically. I move the singlet down and slowly move to take the cargo shorts and singlet both down, and what do I find:



A CB-2000 with 6000 rings, with a 2-gauge captive segment ring PA (and yes, that is the penis I am talking about). I'm immediately excited, as I toy with him, playing with the PA, and he moans in delight. He starts dripping after being in it for a respectable four days. We continue to fluctuate from talking and making out, while others plan the day. We then join the crowd as we go to see one of the "wineries" in Western Pennsylvania. I learn more about the crowd as well as him throughout the trip. He's well-experienced, and prefers to bottom, but is a "top by default" a lot of the time.

We get back from the winery and decide to play. I put my (newly patched) catsuit on and boots, and then we decide to go to the back cabin for some privacy. We walk up there, and chat about what we're going to do. He asks what my limits are and I go off talking about all the things that I'm not willing to try at this point (he had alluded to doing play piercing in the car) as well as the unsafe things. He calmly said "I plan on using rope and any pain will be inflicted via my hands. That good?" I nodded, and ask, "Do we need a safe word, or what you want to do"? He claims, "safe words have places, but they're sometimes crutches. Let's stick with 'No' and 'Stop' for now. If I hear either of those I'll stop and check in with you." He continued, "The purpose is to have fun, and for you to play with me again. Deal?" I agreed, pleased, and we continued our walk in the blazing sun, the black rubber on my arms soaking in the sun and making my flesh feel singed.

We get up to the cabin--locked, but we break in to our own cabin via a credit card (such great security, we joked). And he sits me down as we take off the street clothes I had on. He gets down to his singlet and then goes to get his rope. He had yellow rope that was organized into different lengths. He started by restraining my arms behind me and this was a bit uncomfortable. He takes a break to unzip the front of my catsuit to expose my cock and balls. Proceeding, he started with another length of rope to then to start a body harness and then tied it from my head down to my cock and balls, anchoring it behind my back. He then asked me how it felt. He saw hesitation when I mentioned, "well I can't move," and asked "what's wrong?" I felt numbness in my left index finger. He said it was an aggressive try and untied the arm binders. He wanted me to be comfortable, and wanted something that could last. We joked a bit about something that might be necessary "what's the word...starts with a 'c'... ah yes, Circulation"!

We can't retie in the same pose without making my arm go numb, so we move to the ladder of the loft in the cabin. We have a bit of trouble to find the right hand restraints until he nonchalantly makes ad-hoc wrist restraints out of the rope with ease, tantamount to leather or rubber wrist restraints. I compliment him on his repertoire, and he smiles. He then tethers my arms to the ladder, and then stops. He looks me in the eyes and asks "Will you be okay with a collar? I will make it like the wrist restraints so that it won't slip." I keep eye contact and say, "Yes." I trusted him. Fully. He unravels a new length around my neck three times, starts to finish the tie, and then tethers it to a rung of the ladder. I pull forward with my neck, and it slips and I lose a bit of circulation and calmly say, "uh... it's slipping." He replies, "Um, I see that! I obviously tied it wrong." He then releases me from the collar and retries, and gets it on the second securing. He makes me chase his lips for a kiss, as I wrestle against the new restraint, and he coyly keeps out of reach as I yearn for his lips. He then obliges for a while as he moves his hands up and down my rubbery exterior. He then gets a yellow shoelace out, and ties it around my cock, and then continues to use another around my balls; it has a slip in it. It proceeds to start to pinch my scrotum, and I tell him, and he addresses it, saying "that's not exactly the trial I'm going for." He then ties the loose end to a rung where I have to crouch to maintain just moderate ball pain.

He steps back and asks, "Should I change into rubber?" I smile and nod, and he retires into his room to change, requesting me to yell if anything happens. I wriggle in the roped rubber and see no way to get out. I toy with the wrist restraints, unable to untie them in my current position. I'm stuck, writhing between keeping my knees somewhat bent to abate the ball pain, and bearing the brunt of the ball pain for some leg relief. He gets back in full transparent rubber with attached hood. The front is unzipped, with his CB-2000 protruding outward. I smile and we continue where we last left off. He takes a new length, further restraining me via attaching my boots to the bottom of the ladder. He then proceeds to secure his balls into the same slip with a third shoelace, and then unties my ball restraint to tie the loose ends of each of the ball tetherings together. We look at each other knowing whatever one of us feels, the other will too. He proceeds to kiss me and then step backwards, and as he moves back, my torso stretches to the furthest the rope would allow, to alleviate the inevitable stretch. My futile attempt does not work

He notices my futile attempt, and pulls back further, smiling. He holds it for a while, as we maintain an open-wire communication via our eyes. We see what one another is thinking, and we're connected, not just via our scrotums, but almost as one full body. I feel through him: his movements, his ideas, his actions, his body parts. He has me. We reverberate--as one of us moves, the other reacts. This intensity is maintained, only released when he comes in to kiss me. I can see the sweat accumulating in his rubber, and the way it interacts with his hair. But I am focused on three things: his kiss, our balls, and us. We continue this for a while, and then we start to talk again.

"How are you doing," he asks.
"Great. It's a bit tough," I laugh.
"Good. You want to do something else?"
"Sure."
"I'm not going to be any easier..."
"That's fine."
"I want to see what you can take."

... and that's enough for now. Until next time... I wish you:

ball stretching, buttplay and boys,
Bo

Prehension and Sleepsacks

First off, I think people know that I over-analyze a lot of things, and this is going to one of those points where I am over-analyzing to a point that people may start to disagree with what I have to say.

I have as of late become engrossed by sleepsacks, and have been thinking about them for long periods of time. And I think they have let me understand a lot more about kink than what I used to understand about the process and journey itself. I was at a gear weekend this last weekend (more about that at a later date, I will probably start posting my IML memoir in segments and then the gear weekend in segments as well, though the chronology will be a bit askew).

At any rate, this is in part a reflection after watching a prolonged scene itself, and seeing what I could see when I was looking at it objectively and not directly involved. I want to first give two observations/viewpoints that I feel underscore how I understand kink for myself. Each person responds to it in a different way, but this is the lens under which I view kink. Sex is a conversation between persons, and kink is an alternate type of conversation where two people may converse to understand one another in a new way. It’s more carnal and it can lead to learning about each other in a different level of one another’s psyche. Also, I feel like a Bottom can understand himself better via this category of conversation. Your conscience can prehend (in the words of Whitehead) with the more intimate parts of one’s mind via kink. I feel like sleepsacks are the first gear piece that have found me understanding how prehension works in kink, as one flows between understanding what is going on consciously and subconsciously via the sensory deprivations.



This picture is of therubberfreak, the first person I met at IML (actually met him on the Blue Line when he was part of a trio I asked for directions to the host hotel).

The gear itself promotes aesthetic objectification. It makes the body uniform and symmetric. Both of these characteristics are hardwired, abstract ideals in our minds. The hand placement forces the body to admit a level of posture, and while the Bottom struggles, the only muscles that can break the symmetry are the obliques, a muscle that cannot maintain that broken symmetry for long. When one laces the sleepsack, it adds more symmetry and then thins the body, giving another level of ideals approached, one then laces diagonally the rope upon the abdomen, making an abstract definition of a roped six-pack. Then this in turn makes the pecs protrude. I find it interesting and beautiful how the lacing of a sleepsack unintentionally adds these extra dimensions to the body.

Next a gas mask or an appropriate hood leads to a new level of symmetry by symmetrizing the head, while serving to objectify the Bottom, both in the Top’s and Bottom’s perspective. With this level of sensory deprivation and new mindset, the Bottom can now observe, feel and interact with stimuli and the world in a new headspace.

Let me explain what I feel that a Bottom feels in a sleepsack (in this case, I’d like to assume that the Bottom is sensory deprived as before). I feel one of the strongest points of BDSM immobilization and sensory deprivation is the fact that it allows, with other pieces of gear, to go into a state of isolation, and project oneself down into a level of impersonal trials and stimuli that the Top engages, while still keeping a conversation between the persons. There’s a loss of history, one’s headspace goes to the moment, and one can transcend further into one’s inner id. By keeping focus, I feel one can get to a new level for stimuli, whether it’s a new type of interaction, higher level of pain or stronger reaction to stimuli. This is where the prehension can be reached, and there’s a certain level of beauty attached to it all.

Communication

So, if you recall my post on electro, I had a Dom that kept me in excruciating pain and generally did not give me that much respect. After that experience, I pretty much had cut the Dom off and moved on. I labelled him as a "bad Dom." As of late, we started to talk again. I finally threw it all out there and said how I felt about the situation: disrespected. I'm fine feeling some disrespect in a scene, but when one puts me into a slave position when it was not negotiated from the beginning, I'm upset. He had not listened to what limits were crossed and when things were too much. Also, I need some kind of re-centering when an intense scene occurs. He apologized, and we continued to talk, pinpointed what went wrong and troubleshooted.

Once specific things that went wrong were found, understood and articulated, we continued to find what alternatives worked for both of us. We found a benchmark and met and explored it. We respected each others wants at this benchmark and it worked really well, and have decided to take that and move further using that.

I think this is a lesson for myself and I want to share it with others. Sometimes with kink you can get too hurt either emotionally or physically in a scene, and be left out to dry afterwards. Kink sex is another vehicle in which two people communicate, and when the sub hurt too much, the communication suffers. This is when one should bring the issue up. Renegotiation must happen in order to make things better and if the two can find a new agreement then it's definitely retrying.

Sometimes a Dom's desires does not align with the sub's at all, and then it is best to just not reconvene, and both should be strong and understand that their kinks do not align well. But otherwise, it's worth trying again to find a good benchmark and then work up. It worked this time for me, and if you're in a town where it's hard to find good kink players, it's definitely to your advantage to not just toss out guys that you already have some connection with.

Until next time, I wish you

Communication, cockrings, and cum control,
Bo

Electro

When I first tried electro this spring, it was pretty terrible. I was in excruciating pain and the Dom was just shouting at me that I was just whining. Well, this weekend I got a great electro experience for the first time. After having some drinks with a friend in West Philly, I got some texts from one of my hot friends saying he was staying in downtown Philly for the night and would like to hang out at the Bike Stop. So I run down to the Stop, go to the Pit, and then meet up with my friend. I talk him for a bit and then talk to the GM Shawn that I absolutely adore, for a good straight...ish man. He's a good kinkster.

So my friend and I go over to his place to play, he gets into his rubber surfsuit and then starts edging me. I start to feel my hole tingling and ask if he has hole toys we could play with. After looking at his inventory, he had a fully sterilized Electro Butt-Plug (he had the medium). I looked at it with two emotions, excitement as I've played with this style of plug before, and also worry due to my previous experience. But he said we could go slow and see what happens and could always turn it off. I definitely suggest doing electro with someone that gives you some control on what goes on for the first time if not the first few times now, and especially with someone that definitely has used it tons on themselves.

He used the plug with the E-232 Power Box. We kept it on "thrust" for the entire session as it was his favorite and I wanted to keep it simple for the first time. We mainly focused on playing with intensity and the time lapse between shocks. The Key : Electro Gel. This really helps curb any pain from the shocks and make it just purely an intense experience. We started slowly and saw how I reacted to it, and built up slowly. The first time, the Sir took me to around 10 or 11 o'clock on the same power box with the Electric Bands (one around the head of my cock, the other around my cock and balls) and once the gel ran out it was just the end of any enjoyment and I just was wincing in pure agony, with no work up to the level I was at and just flatly in intolerable pain and had no understanding of electro-pleasure.

With my friend this weekend, he got me to 12 o'clock with the plug, and I was moaning with delight, and with a minor conversation on my headspace, we moved up to 1o'clock, and he edged me slowly, milking every second. I writhed in delight and pleasure-torture. The shock really focuses on your prostate and contracts everything inside you and gets more intense the more you clench your hole. So this means, the more you're edged and close, the more intensely you feel the shock, and when he stops edging, you feel less and the cock can recover and not get closer to cumming. This boy really knew how to take me to the edge and deny me. It drove me insanely happy. When I finally came, it was extremely rewarding.

So, a few observations for the first time for people in electro: Yes, having electro in your hole might be scarier, but choose that over the cock torture for your first time. Definitely make sure you have a healthy dialogue, and you probably want it to be on equal footing, even if you're tied up for the first time, so that you can say "it's too much" and he'll put it down instead of just scream "suck it up." There's plenty more life with electro to live for him to start Domming your balls off later, make the first time very comfortable and make sure you enjoy it, you do not need to start from the max.

I now cannot wait for my next electro experience. And no, electro pictures and videos do not give the experience any justice. You have to try it yourself in your own headspace and journey to really understand what it does. It's extremely unique, and beautiful in this regard.

Until next time, I wish you...

E-stim, Enemas, and Exhibitionism,
Bo

Why? - CB 6000

Chastity. Isn't sex about the orgasm? This seems like it really would just a hindrance. Well, at one point in my life, I thought this exact thought... but then I started to think about chastity and put one of these things on for a test drive.



The CB-6000. Kink sex is not about the orgasm, it's about what you want to make it about, whichever kink turns you and your partner(s) on. For the people that are already into chastity itself and being locked up you already enjoy this. I'm going to focus on speaking here to the people that are into other things, and how chastity can amplify the things other people are into.

Chastity devices like the CB - 6000 can be used by a Dom to assert control of the most innermost parts of the subs life for long term, namely his orgasm. Also, each time the sub starts to become hard, the cage constrains the cock and quells any hope for an erection, while becoming uncomfortable for the sub. So, the sub is constantly reminded that his cock is controlled by his Dom--that it is owned. The sub becomes more subservient over time knowing that by serving SIR is the only way he will get to cum.

One thing that I find really interesting about the CB-6000 is the idea of being in it while fucking. When one is anally stimulated, prostate stimulation is much more intense when one does not have the ability to touch their cock. The intensity is extended. One can keep their sub not bound but in a CB-6000, and he still has the inability to touch themselves before you want them to, let alone cum.

The sub doesn't even get to feel his cock brush around in his pants, and hence when it gets taken out of the cage, it will become much more sensitive. Also, the buildup will make it even more intense when he finally cums. This makes edging and milking even more intense, and the sub even more desperate to cum, the longer the device is on. One can get the sub to get bound, take the cage off, and do what one wants, put it back on, and then untie the sub.

This last part is a good scenario for a Dom/sub relation where the sub enjoys forced milking and edging. If they are in a fwb relation, the Dom keeps the sub locked up, and the sub comes over once a week to get tied up, edged for a while, come a couple of times, or three, or four... or not at all, and then gets locked up when the Dom is done. Bye! See you next week, same time same place.

I have also heard of a humiliation scenario where a straight boy was humiliated by having a gay boy have him locked up and control everything.

One issue I have found though about this device is that almost everyone that gets into one gets excited when you start to put it on. This makes you have to wait for yourself to get flaccid before putting the cage on, so I suggest putting the ring on first, waiting... and then when the cock isn't expecting it, put the cage on and lock quickly. Also be sure to lube the cock when you put the cage on it. It's also crucial to get the right ring or else the contraption will really make the balls uncomfortable, and intolerable for long play. Another great way to get past the hard-on-while-caging point is once you get into a routine, you can just milk the sub until he can't even get hard anymore, and then put the cage on at your leisure!

I think that's it for this week's "Why?". Leave a comment if you have any other great suggestions or curiosities about this device.

Until then, I wish you

Cum control, Collars, and Clothespins,
Bo

What a boy wants...

I think around twice a week I get a message on some kink site that has a body like this

"looking for a dad?"

While I totally understand that some people are looking for this, many others are not, so I simply reply with a "Nope. Good luck!" While I am predominantly submissive, I feel outside of the bedroom, I want to bring as much if not more to the table to a relationship. I like winning bread, if you will. As I understand it doesn't hurt to ask if someone is looking for a dad, but usually one of the two a week counters and ups the ante with some form of monetary or otherwise proposition, not taking the gentle brush off well: "i could give u anything your heart desires" or "I can take care of you as well as you can imagine" something along those lines. I usually respond with something along "I have plenty of intangibles I need, so I don't think that's true", and usually I get one a month that goes the extra mile and says "Oh but that's what I'm best at!"

This is when I say "get me an offer of professorship at Northwestern and then we'll talk."

The majority of kinksters, I believe, do not live their lives solely surrounding their kinks. Sexuality, freedom of physical expression, liberation from norms, and physical satisfaction are all very important parts of each person's life, but it doesn't define exactly who each one of us is. One of my kinkier friends today said his happiness is what he sees when he closes his eyes and what he sees: biking, watersports (not the kink kind) and general fun outdoor activities.

But it is a part of us. There's something romantic about having your Sir tuck you in at night with a kiss and a simultaneous 'click' of the padlock. It's just how we say "I care for you" in a different tongue. Kink adds a new vocabulary of body language and a new level of conversation between people, but it isn't all of our lives.

A boy can be completely independent in his day-to-day life, and this is one of the reasons I do not want to identify as a slave. What I want is a Sir that can really stand on his two feet and treat me as an equal when it's time for that, but also knows when I need to do my duty for him.

So, for all you Daddy's that don't respect or understand boys' worldwide wishes I say:



Flip off. And for all you Sir's and Dad's that respect our aspirations and want to befriend us and be around us while we achieve them I say:



Woof! Let's play.

Until next time, I wish you

Pup, Piss and Punch Play,
Bo

PS Photos due to/of my good rubber pig friend, rubbaboy.

Why? - Double Duty Gags.

I am going to start a weekly post now about "Why?" This is a question I get a lot as I come out to friends as kinky. They ask why I like certain things. The most obvious reason that I find perfectly valid to give is "because it gets me hard, and I enjoy it." We, as kinksters, need no other reason, but I feel it really helps to give a good logical reason of why it gets us hard, and convinces people that kink is not just paraphilia in the DSM-IV, but really actually fun for all!

I'll start this with a piece that I have recently be ogling over the pictures of:



The Double Duty Gag at Mr. S Leather. First off, the gag is a wonderful piece of gear. It's pretty obvious why it's used: first off, the sub loses his ability to speak or voice their opinions losing say of what is going on. Secondly, he is forced to keep his mouth in a somewhat uncomfortable position for an extended period of time, leaving him wanting to do what SIR wants him to do so as to not get punished further. Thirdly, it definitely looks hot! But some great things are missed by these reasons that I quite enjoy.

For me, one of the best parts of a gag is that if it's in long enough, one starts to have a strand of drool come out of their mouth. While shirtless and standing, one feels this strand slowly trickle down their body, and it's a very sensual part of the gag.

Now, the double duty gag, I think highlights all these things, but adds a very new aspect of the gag. With two people gagged tightly next to one another you get this new level of closeness. You can't not look into the eyes of the guy you're bound to, hopeless wanting to kiss the victim, but indefinitely unable to. The sexual tension just builds. In effect, the gag can be used to amplify your desire for the guy you're tied to, and I don't think anyone vanilla would disagree that becoming more and more into your other partner is a good thing. I feel as austere and cold as this gear piece might be, it's something that vanilla people can understand.

Then again, on the other hand, the Dom side of me is squealing for the chance to put two straight guys with humiliation fetishes in this thing together. :-)

Until next time. I wish you...

Gags, GOM and Gungeplay,
Bo.

Background.

My history has me being a hesitant and late starter in the realm of sex; however, in the realm of kink and understanding what this part of sexual agency and identity is fairly early. I figured out that I was queer at the age of 15, and it took a year to learn of the kink-core perspective that I had.

It was a quick change: I went from "hey, that guy in my class is cute." to watching leather fisting porn within 12 months. For this reason, I have felt that kink and exploring sexually many fields is innate in my sexual agency and expression.

Though, this speedy liberation found resistance in my parents. When I came out to them one fateful evening in the winter of 2004, the family's dynamics changed. I was forced into conversion therapy, a faith-based therapist tried to help me find Jesus in order to "straighten" out the situation, if you will. This led me to repressing my sexuality and it all became a form of taboo for a good solid 1.5 years, until I left to go to college. Four years later, the summer after college and after a long vanilla relationship, I actually started to explore my mind's kink. It started with edging, then it went to bondage, and quickly to leather, hoods, well, you get the idea. Plenty on this stuff and details later. Pics included.

When I started, I was fearful. Afraid of the unknown, afraid of what would happen when I took the plunge and listened to what my heart really wanted, and afraid of what others would think about me. After a year of my journey, I have realized how far I have come. Kink and my expression in it has actually been a source of my confidence. I am now comfortable in my (often rubberized) skin.

I think this journey merits a forum to share my thoughts, experiences, and opinions. No matter where you are in your kink journey, drop me a line to let me know.